Anger

[17th Angel]

Originally Posted by Netti-Netti

Or maybe they decide the self inflicted damage is actually worth it.

Thats what I said

I know there have been examples in my own life where I have been more than willing to inflict or cause self pain/loss/damage/blah de blah de blargh.... Knowing in the long run I will "win" Sure if most look back hard enough they have too.... Cause you're all the same you humans! *sneers*

[nativeastral]

Originally Posted by Alex P

Thats what I said

I know there have been examples in my own life where I have been more than willing to inflict or cause self pain/loss/damage/blah de blah de blargh.... Knowing in the long run I will "win" Sure if most look back hard enough they have too.... Cause you're all the same you humans! *sneers*

always knew you were an alien

[shawn]

Originally Posted by Vajradhara

Namaste all,

i'll offer my own views on this in a few posts though i'd like to hear others views before then.

primarily i'm interested in hearing how you deal with anger when it arises, the methods, steps, techniques and so forth which you use to cool the flames.

it doesn't have to be particularly Buddhist

metta,

~v

Without heat, how will one make the water boil?
Anger is fire and so the same rules apply as for handling fire (why and how).
Unconstructive or destructive anger is never good, but constructive anger can, at times, be a very good thing.

Just don't go to sleep being angry.
deal with whatever caused the event.

[citizenzen]

Originally Posted by shawn

...anger can, at times, be a very good thing.

And guns can, at times, be very good things too.

It just turns out that the vast majority of time they're wielded destructively.

I'd say, it's only the wisest of people who can channel anger effectively. In the hands of the rest of us it's a dangerous drug.

[Zenda71]

I'm reminded of the famous quote: Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned.

Here's the thing, however: How many of us never get angry? I often think that the real practice is not preventing anger from arising (although if someone knows the trick to that, please let me know!) but rather not indulging it. I take that view that anger is like everything else. You get angry and you let it go. You get happy, and you let it go. It makes no difference what it is; you just let it go.

If that makes any sense...

[citizenzen]

Originally Posted by Zenda71

You get angry and you let it go. You get happy, and you let it go. It makes no difference what it is; you just let it go.

Yup. It'll come back soon enough anyway.

[Quahom1]

Originally Posted by citizenzen

And guns can, at times, be very good things too.

It just turns out that the vast majority of time they're wielded destructively.

I'd say, it's only the wisest of people who can channel anger effectively. In the hands of the rest of us it's a dangerous drug.

Not true at all. If it were so, then there would be millions dead on American streets.

[citizenzen]

Originally Posted by Quahom1

Not true at all. If it were so, then there would be millions dead on American streets.

You're right Q1. According to the U.S. Department of Justice:

In 2005, 11,346 persons were killed by firearm violence and 477,040 persons were victims of a crime committed with a firearm. Most murders in the United States are committed with firearms, especially handguns.

So it's not "millions dead", it's just a half-million dead, injured or assaulted. What the heck am I complaining about anyway?

[Vajradhara]

please save political discussions for that forum.

metta,

~v

[immortalitylost]

I'm weird when I get angry... There's one person, only one, that I get angry like a normal person around... I yell, and junk. Like how everyone else gets angry.

Then other people I know, and love, when I get angry at them, I cry. And that pisses me off more, lol. But I can't do anything about it cuz I'm cryin like a little baby.

Then, anyone else, I can't get angry, like normal angry. I get all shaky, and can't even yell, and the angrier I get the worse it gets. It's kinda like wearing one of those zappy dog collars. It sux.

But the one person I get normal angry with, I tend to get angry at them initially, like as a person, and realize in the midst of my anger that I'm really angry at the things that they do... this always happens just shy of the point where I wanna strangle them... which is good...

Ah, but I'm an odd duck... can't even get angry like a normal person.

Anywho, I find it's easiest just to get some space between me and whoever makes me angry, just get some breathing room until I'm sure I've cooled down enough to face the person and discuss things calmly, to try to sort out the problems I'm having.

I realize this won't work in every situation, but, I've kinda only got one situation to work from, ya know? Lol.

[Netti-Netti]

Originally Posted by Vajradhara

please save political discussions for that forum.

Politics is largely about anger and much of the content is in fact a kind of stylized expression of that emotion that helps polarize issues and generate hope by invoking the possibilities for a vindictive triumph over the opposing party.

[seattlegal]

Originally Posted by Netti-Netti

Politics is largely about anger.

True!

[Dream]

Anger is a stronger emotion than pride or desire. Once you understand this, you can use it as a means to quiet the other emotions in order to see the situation clearly, without having to resort to the 'heavy handed approach' of blinding rage. {It sounds like a good explanation for my observations from this previous post:

So anger is like Dorothy's little red shoes. Just tap your heels together and you're home.

There have been several places where I've noted that Buddhist texts often use the term emotion and thought as though they are interchangeable. As it turns out, this is a recognized controversy. In one article, the authors went into some detail as to why they ended up going with one or the other term when translating from the Pali scriptures.

In my experience, the emotions are able to have personality of their own. They are not conscious and not in charge; however they are traveling companions or marriage partners to conscious thought. Sometimes emotions do not understand a situation as soon you understand it consciously. For example: you are insulted yet you don't feel hurt until the next day. Sometimes they understand early -- you find something hillarious and you don't figure out why until later. They can also disagree, and they can be wrong. They can be overbearing and overprotective, as when a person is controlled by one emotion or another. The main thing is they have their own 'Thought process' of their own.

[Dream]

Oops forgot to supply quotes. The first quote is Seattlegal and the second is Netti Netti.

[Nivek]

I''ve always been a rather calm, easy-going person. I used to be quite sensitive (still am to a certain extent) and when something would anger or upset me I would hold on to it for a while. Now though, I've become more aware that the feelings themselves (of saddness, irritation, anger, etc) are less substantial than I used to think, it's alot easier to let them go. Of course they arise, everyone gets mad at certain things like insults and such, it's just that I don't grasp or hold on that much anymore. I've really noticed this helping some over time that has past.