Favorite Song Lyrics

[juantoo3]

You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch
Author: Dr. Seuss


You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch.
You really are a heel.
You're as cuddly as a cactus,
You're as charming as an eel.
Mr. Grinch.


You're a bad banana
With a greasy black peel.


You're a monster, Mr. Grinch.
Your heart's an empty hole.
Your brain is full of spiders,
You've got garlic in your soul.
Mr. Grinch.


I wouldn't touch you, with a
thirty-nine-and-a-half foot pole.


You're a vile one, Mr. Grinch.
You have termites in your smile.
You have all the tender sweetness
Of a seasick crocodile.
Mr. Grinch.


Given the choice between the two of you
I'd take the seasick crockodile.


You're a foul one, Mr. Grinch.
You're a nasty, wasty skunk.
Your heart is full of unwashed socks
Your soul is full of gunk.
Mr. Grinch.


The three words that best describe you,
are as follows, and I quote: "Stink. Stank. Stunk."


You're a rotter, Mr. Grinch.
You're the king of sinful sots.
Your heart's a dead tomato splot
With moldy purple spots,
Mr. Grinch.


Your soul is an apalling dump heap overflowing
with the most disgraceful assortment of deplorable
rubbish imaginable,
Mangled up in tangled up knots.


You nauseate me, Mr. Grinch.
With a nauseaus super-naus.
You're a crooked jerky jockey
And you drive a crooked horse.
Mr. Grinch.


You're a three decker saurkraut and toadstool
sandwich
With arsenic sauce.


Copyright © 1957, Dr. Seuss.

[Snoopy]

Losing Faith in Words

I just can't see why you can't see what I mean,
but I can't make things any plainer,
the words get in the way
–is that quite what I mean?
If not now, then certainly sooner or later
we've got a problem with communication
–look, I scrabble with my hands
I try to get some head-room from the elevation
but you just don't understand
Most of the things we say mean we most of the time
treat our speech with derision,
flap our hands in body-telegram
- I know that gets through
so much better than anything said with precision.
We've got a problem with communication
and it's getting quite absurd...
well, I think I'm going to flip out from the sheer frustration,
yes, I'm losing faith in words.

We've got a problem with communication,
only getting through in anagrams
–I try to get some linkage from articulation,
I try to get some head-room from the elevation,
I try to pull back something from my education...
Yes, I try to, try to, try to but I just don't understand,
I try, I just don't understand,
I talk, you just don't understand.
Sometimes I don't know why I bother,
but I'm bothered.

- Peter Hammill.

s.

[Snoopy]

The Jargon King

He prescribes the subject
he proscribes outsiders
his terms have a golden ring.
He wants to find some order
quantifying chaos
in words that all the children sing.
He tabulates the lexicon
vocabulary minimised
bow down to the Jargon King.
All questions become so simple
if we eat the inane answer
if we all agree to ju-ju speak
we fit into the formula
we all without exception
approve the rule.

We don't understand
he must be clever
he must be clever
he must be right
he must be right
we don't understand

Closed the ranks and barricades
imposed the secret language
complexity all catch-phrased
word-drugged any anguish
pigeon-holed allusions
shut the vault behind us

It's an obvious conclusion
we'll be the chattels of His Highness.
Bow down to the Jargon King
and his minion code-words.
Here comes the reign.

- Peter Hammill.

s.

[juantoo3]

Rock On
-David Essex

Hey kid, rock and roll
Rock on, ooh, my soul
Hey kid, boogey too, did ya

Hey shout, summertime blues
Jump up and down in my blue suede shoes
Hey kid, rock and roll, rock on

And where do we go from here
Which is the way that's clear

Still looking for that blue jean, baby queen
Prettiest girl I ever seen
See her shake on the movie screen, Jimmy Dean
(James Dean)

And where do we go from here
Which is the way that's clear

Still looking for that blue jean, baby queen
Prettiest girl I ever seen
See her shake on the movie screen, Jimmy Dean
Jimmy Dean
Rock on
Rock on
Rock on

Hey, hey
Rock and roll
Rock on

Rock on
Hey, hey
Rock and roll
Rock on

Rock on
Hey, hey
Rock and roll
Rock on

Rock on
Hey, hey
Rock and roll
Rock on........

[juantoo3]

Bang a Gong (Get It On)
-T-Rex

Well you're dirty and sweet, clad in black
Don't look back and I love you
You're dirty and sweet, oh yeah
Well you're slim and you're weak
You've got the teeth of a hydra upon you
You're dirty sweet and you're my girl.

Chorus:
Get it on, bang the gong , get it on
Get it on, bang the gong, get it on

You're built like a car, you've got a hub cap diamond star halo
You're built like a car, oh yeah
You're an untamed youth that's the truth with your cloak full of eagles
You're dirty sweet and you're my girl.

Repeat chorus

You're windy and wild, you've got the blues in your shoes and your
stockings
You're windy and wild, oh yeah
You're built like a car, you've got a hub cap diamond star halo
You're dirty sweet and you're my girl.

Repeat chorus

You're dirty and sweet, clad in black, don't look back
And I love you
You're dirty and sweet, oh yeah
You dance when you walk so let's dance, take a chance, understand me
You're dirty sweet and you're my girl.

Repeat chorus

[juantoo3]

"Movin Out"
-Billy Joel

Anthony works in the grocery store
Savin his pennies for some day
Mama Leone left a note on the door
She said "Sonny move out to the country"
Ah but working too hard can give you
A heart attack, ack, ack, ack, ack, ack
You ought-a know by now
Who needs a house out in Hackensack?
Is that all you get for your money?

And it seems such a waste of time
If that's what it's all about
Mama if that's movin up then I'm movin out
Mm I' movin out, mm oo oo uh huh mm hm

You should never argue with a crazy mi mi mi mi mi mind
You ought-a know by now
You can pay Uncle Sam with the overtime
Is that all you get for your money
And if that's what you have in mind
Then that's what you're all about
Good luck movin up cause I'm movin out
Mm I'm movin out Mm oo oo uh huh mm hm

Sergeant O'Leary is walkin the beat
At night he becomes a bartender
He works at Mister Cacciatores
Down on Sullivan Street
Across from the medical center
And he's tradin in his Chevy for
A Cadillac ack ack ack ack ack
You ought-a know by now
If he can't drive with a broken back
At least he can polish the fenders

And it seems such a waste of time
If that's what it's all about
Mama if that's movin up then I'm movin out
Mm I' movin out, mm oo oo uh huh mm hm

[Dondi]

Lying in the Hands of God
Dave Matthews Band

Baby I'll be your soldier.
Gladly, I'll do your bidding.
Just a taste of what you’re holding,
for just a taste you could only... me.

Save your sermons for someone that’s afraid to love.
I'll be right here lying in the hands of God.

Here it comes diving in to me.
Now the floor is the ceiling.
If you never flew why would you
Cut the wings off a butterfly... Fly.

Save your sermons for someone that’s afraid to love.
If you knew what I feel then you couldn't be so sure.
I'll be right here lying in the hands of God.
If you feel angels in your hand,
Tear drops of joy runs down your face, you will rise.

Fillin' me up, now drain me...
Skin begins to grow back slowly,
Faster ‘til I'm choking,
Really should call my mother, mother.

Save your sermons for someone that’s afraid to love.
If you knew what I feel then you couldn't be so sure.
I'll be right here lying in the hands of God.

I am in love with nothing less…
Tear drops of joy runs off my face,
I will rise for someone that’s afraid to love.
If you knew what I feel, then you couldn't be so sure.
I'll be right here lying in the hands of God.

Now the floor is the ceiling.
If you never flew, why would you...
If you never flew, why would you? You…
Why would you?


I found these lyrics rather profound, considering that Dave Matthews is agnostic, if I'm not mistaken.

Great album, BTW. This is my favorite cut.

YouTube - Lying in the Hands of God

RIP LeRoi Moore

[juantoo3]

They're Coming to Take Me Away
-Napoleon the 14th

Remember when you ran away
And I got on my knees and begged you
Not to go because I'd go berserk?

WELL,

You left me anyhow and
Then the days got worse and worse
And now you see I've gone completely
out of my mind,

AND

[chorus 1]
They're coming to take me away,
Haha, they're coming to take me away,
Ho ho, hee hee, ha ha,
To the funny farm
Where Life is Beautiful all the time
And I'll be happy to see
Those Nice Young Men
In their Clean White Coats
And they're coming to take me AWAY,
HA HAAAAA

You thought it was a joke,
and so you LAUGHED, YOU LAUGHED
When I had said that losing you
Would make me flip my lid,

RIGHT?

You know you laughed.
I HEARD you laugh, you laughed
And laughed and laughed
And then you left,
And now you see I'm Utterly Mad

AND

[chorus 2]
They're coming to take me away,
Haha, they're coming to take me away,
Ho ho, hee hee, ha ha,
To the Happy Home with Trees and Flowers
And Chirping Birds and basket weavers
Who sit and smile and
Twiddle their thumbs and toes
And they're coming to Take me Away,
HAHAAAAAAAAA

I cooked your food,
I cleaned your house,
And this is how you pay me back
For all my kind unselfish loving deeds

RIGHT?

Well, you just wait,
They'll get you yet,
And when they do, they'll put you in
the ASPCA, you mangy MUTT,

AND

(chorus 1)
(chorus 2)
(chorus 1 trailing into mumbles in the distance)

Napoleon The 14th - Theyre Coming To Take Me Away Lyrics - Theyre Coming To Take Me Away - Lyrics On Demand

just because I'm having one of *those* days...haha, heehee, hoho

[Dondi]

Oh, well, Juan. If you wanna go that way:

YouTube - Basketball Jones - Cheech & Chong

Basketball Jones, I got a Basketball Jones
Got a Basketball Jones, oh baby, oo-oo-oo

Yes, I am the victim of a Basketball Jones
Ever since I was a little baby, I always be dribblin'
In fac', I was de baddest dribbler in the whole neighborhood
Then one day, my mama bought me a basketball
And I loved that basketball
I took that basketball with me everywhere I went
That basketball was like a basketball to me

I even put that basketball underneath my pillow
Maybe that's why I can't sleep at night
I need help, ladies and gentlemens
I need someone to stand beside me
I need, I need someone to set a pick for me at the free-throw line of life
Someone I can pass to
Someone to hit the open man on the give-and-go
And not end up in the popcorn machine
So cheerleaders, help me out

{cheerleaders sing repeatedly...}
(Basketball Jones, I got a Basketball Jones)
(I got a Basketball Jones, oh baby, oo-oo-ooo)

{while Tyrone Shoelaces sings/speaks...}
Oh, that sounds so sweet
Sing it out
C'mon Coach Booty, Red Blazer, sing along with me
That be bad, honky
Yeah
I want everybody in the whole stadium to stand up and sing with us
Oh yeah, sing it out like you're proud
All right, everybody watchin' coast-to-coast, sing along with us
Bill Russell, sing along with us
Chick Hearn, sing along with us
Chris Schenkel, don't sing nothin'

Oh, it feels so good
Gimme the ball
I'll go one-on-one against the world, left-handed
I could stuff it from center court with my toes
I could jump on top of the backboard, take off a quarter, leave fifteen cents change I
could, I could dribble behind my back I got more moves than Ex-Lax I'm bad I could
dribble with my tongue Here I go down court, try to stop me You can't stop me 'cause I
got a Basketball Jones Here I come That's my hook shot with my eyebrow Yeah, I could
dunk it with my nose I'm, I'm bad as King Kong, gimme the ball I'm hot, I'm hot as...,
I'm hot as..., I'm hot as... uh Uh, uh, uh, uh

(Basketball Jones, I got a Basketball Jones, I got a Basketball Jones, Basketball Jones)


I didn't know George Harrison, Billy Preston, Michelle Phillips (Mamas & Papas), Klass Voorman (Revolver album designer...plays bass), and Carole King played/sang on this!

"I got more moves than Ex-Lax"

Hilarious.

[juantoo3]

Shaving Cream
-Benny Bell



I have a sad story to tell you
It may hurt your feelings a bit
Last night as I walked into my bathroom
I stepped in a big pile of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen

I think I'll break off with my girlfriend
Her antics are queer, I'll admit
Each time I say, "Darling, I love you"
She tells me that I'm full of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen

Our baby fell out of the window
You'd think that her head would be split
But good luck was with her that morning
She fell in a barrel of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen

My old lady died in a bathtub
She died from a terrible fit
In order to fulfill her wishes
She was buried in six feet of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen

When I was in France with the army
One day I looked inside my kit
I thought i would find me a sandwich
But the darn thing was loaded with ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen

And now folks my story is ended
I think it is time I should quit
And if anyone of you feel offended
Push your head in a bucket of ...
Shaving cream, be nice and clean
Shave every day and you'll always look keen

Another one of those days....

[juantoo3]

Camp Granada
-Allan Sherman

Hello Mudda,
hello Fadda,
Here I am at
Camp Granada.
Camp is very
entertaining,
And they say we'll have some fun if it stops raining.

I went hiking
with Joe Spivy;
He developed
poison ivy.
You remember
Lenard Skinner;
He got ptomaine poisoning last night after dinner.

All the counselors
hate the waiters,
And the lake has
alligators,
And the head coach
wants no sissies,
So he reads to us from something called Ulysses.

Now I don't want
that this should scare you,
But my bunkmate
has malaria.
You remember
Jeffery Hardy,
They're about to organize a searching party.

Take me home, oh
Mudda, Fadda,
Take me home, I
hate Granada!
Don't leave me
out in the forest,
Where I might get eaten by a bear.

Take me home,
I promise I will not make noise,
Or mess the house
with other boys,
O please don't
make me stay,
I've been here one whole day.


Dearest Father,
Darling Mother,
How's my precious
little brudda?
Let me come home
if you miss me,
I would even let Aunt Bertha hug and kiss me.

Wait a minute,
it stopped hailing,
Guys are swimming,
guys are sailing.
Playing baseball,
gee that's betta,
Mudda, Fadda kindly disregard this letta!

[juantoo3]

My Ding-A-Ling
-Chuck Berry

When I was a little bitty boy
My grandmother bought me a cute little toy
Silver bells hangin on a string
she told me it was my ding a ling a ling

Chorus:
o my ding a ling ,
my ding a ling
i want u to play with my ding a ling
(repeat)

you know then mamma took me to sunday school
they tried to teach me the golden rule
every time the choir would sing
i'd take out my ding a ling a ding

then mamma took me to grammar school
but i stopped off in the vestibule
every time that bell would ring
catch me playin with my ding a ling a ling

(chorus)

once i was climbing the garden wall
i slipped and had a terrible fall
i fell so hard i heard bells ring
but held on to my ding a ling a ling

(chorus)

I remember the girl next door
we used to play house on the kitchen floor
she'd be the queen and i'd be the king
and i let her play with my ding a ling a ling

(chorus x2)

once i was swiming cross turtle creek
man them snappers all around my feet
sure was hard swimming across that thing
with both hands holding my ding a ling a ling

(chorus)

girl downstairs
shes so big and bold
grandma warned me, "shes too old"
she used to take me swingin in the school yard swing
swing down and take my ding a ling a ling

(chorus)

this here song it aint so sad
the cutest little song you ever had
those of you who will not sing
you must be playing with your own ding a ling

(chorus)

your ding a ling
your ding a ling
we saw u playin with your ding a ling

[juantoo3]

Dead Dog Rover
(Splatterpunk Version)
copyright ©2004 by Blind Lemming Chiffon
Tune: I'm Looking Over a Four-Leaf Clover
based on earlier parodies by anonymous others which, face it, needed work

I'm lookin¹ over my dead dog rover I ran over with my mower.
His bones are all shattered, intestines are gone;
Gray matter is scattered all over the lawn.
His blood is a geyser of fertilizer:
My roses are red with gore.
I'm lookin¹ over my dead dog rover I ran over with my mower.

I'm lookin¹ over my dead dog rover I told you about before.
His tail¹s in the gutter, his head¹s in the gulch.
His liver¹s in slivers of finely-chopped mulch.
His heart¹s in a disco in San Francisco -
The dancers ran out the door.
I'm lookin¹ over my dead dog rover I ran over with my mower.

I'm lookin¹ over my dead dog rover. Don't worry - there¹s not much more.
He couldn¹t be flatter. He¹s nothing but slime.
He won¹t need a haircut for quite a long time.
One thing you can bet on, the speed my mower¹s set on
Could¹ve been just a little slower.
I'm lookin¹ over my dead dog rover
I ran over with
I ran over with
I ran over with my mower.

*verbatim, emphasis mine -jt3, from: BLC Lyrics

[juantoo3]

Uneasy Rider
-Charlie Daniels

I was takin a trip out to L.A.
Toolin along in my cheverolet
Tokin on a number and diggin on the radio

Just as I crossed the Mississippi line
I heard that highway start to whine
And I knew that left rear tire was about to blow

Well the spare was flat and I got uptight
Cause there wasn't a filling station in sight
So I just limped on down the shoulder on the rim

I went as far as I could and when I stopped the car
It was right in front of this little bar
Kind of a red-neck lookin joint called the Dew Drop Inn

I stuffed my hair up under my hat
And told the bartender that I had a flat
And ywould he be kind enough to give me change for a one

There was one thing I was sure proud to see
There wasn't a soul in the place except for him and me
He just looked disgusted and pointed toward the telephone

I called up the station down the road a ways
He said he wasn't very busy today
And he could have somone out there in just about 10 minutes or so

He said," Now, you just stay right where yer at!"
And I didn't bother to tell the darn fool
That I sure as hell didn't have anyplace else to go

So I ordered up a beer and sat down at the bar
When some guy walked in and said, "Who owns this car
With the peace sign, the mag wheels and the four on the floor?"

He looked at me and I damn near died
And I decided that I'd just wait outside
So I laid a dollar on the bar and headed for the door

Just when I wthought I'd get outta there with my skin
These 3 big dudes come strollin in
With one old drunk chick and some fella with green teeth

Now the last thing I wanted was to get into a fight
In Jackson Mississippi on a Saturday night
Especially when there was three of them and only one of me

I was almost to the door when the biggest one
Said, "You tip your hat to this lady, son!"
And when I did, all that hair fell out from underneath

They all started laughin and I felt kinda sick
And I knew I better think of something pretty quick
So I just reached out and kicked old green teeth right in the knee

Now he let out a yell that'd curl yer hair
But before he could move I grabbed me a chair
And said "Now watch him Folks cause he's a fairly dangerous man!"

"You may not know it but this man is a spy.
He's a undercover agent for the FBI
And he's been sent down here to infiltrate the Ku Klux Klan!"

He was still bent over holdin on to his knee
But everybody else was looking and listening to me
And I laid it on thicker hand heavier as I went

"He's a friend of them long haired, hippy-type, pinko fags!
I betchya he's even got a commie flag
tacked up on the wall inside of his garage."

"He's a snake in the grass, I tell ya guys.
He may look dumb but that's just a disguise,
He's a mastermind in the ways of espionage"

"Would you believe this man has gone as far
As tearing Wallace stickers off the bumpers of cars.
And he voted for George McGovern for President."

They started lookin real suspicious at him
He jumped up and said "Now just wait a minute Jim!
You know he's lying I been living here all of my life!"

"I'm a faithful follower of Brother John Birch
And I belong to the Antioch Baptist Church.
And I aint even got a garage, you can call home and ask my wife!"

Then he started saying somethin bout the way I was dressed
But I didn't wait around to hear the rest
I was too busy moving and hoping I didn't run outta luck

When I hit the door I was making tracks
And they were just taking my car down off the jacks
So I threw the man a twenty and jumped in and fired that mother up

Mario Andretti wouldda sure been proud
Of the way I was movin when I passed that crowd
Coming out the door and headed toward me at a trott

Now I guess I should of gone ahead and run
But somehow I just couldn't resist the fun
Of chasing them all just once around the parking lot

I had them all out there steppin and fetchin
Like their heads was on fire and their asses was catchin
then I figgered I had better go ahead and split before the cops got there

When I hit the road I was really wheelin
Had gravel flyin and rubber squeelin
And I didn't slow down till I was almost to Arkansas

I think I'm gonna reroute my trip
I wonder if anybody'd think I'd flipped
If I went to L.A., via Omaha

Uneasy Rider 88
-Charlie Daniels

Me and my buddy got us a wild hair
And figured we wanted to go somewhere
So we loaded up in my ragtop Chevrolet
We had a little bit of money
And a whole lot of show
Adn with Hank Jr. blaring on the radio
We got us a tank full of gas
And we was on our way

We figured we'd go down to New Orleans
We were barrelling down old 17
When a man with a blinking red light
Was on our tail
He said you were doing 60 in a 45
But I'm gonna let you go this time
But if I catch you again
I'm gonna slap you in the county jail

We said thank you sir you sure been nice
And you ain't gonna have to tell us twice
And we were Southbound and down with the wind
Blowing in our faces
We kept on rolling and pretty soon
The radio was cooking out a Haggard tune
And we were pulling into Houston
Checking out all them places

I was feeling dry and I said I think
We ought to stop and get ourselves a drink
And old Jim said yeah 'cause we got time to kill
We kept on rolling and I seen this spot
And we pulled into the parking lot
Of this place called the Cloud Nine Bar and Grill


We walked through the door
And the place was jammed
The lights were low they had a punk rock band
And some orange haired feller singing about suicide
I said Jim this ain't our kind of place
He said well let's just have one round anyway
So against my better judgement we walked on inside
Went up to the bar and we sat down
This feller walked up and said I'll buy this round
And he sat down on the barstool next to Jim

He looked like a girl but he talked like a guy
He had lipstick on and mascara in his eyes
And everybody in that place looked just about like him
I said Jim this ain't our kind of bar
Let's just go on out and get back in the car
'Cause there's gonna be trouble
Ain't no sense in taking a chance
We was getting up getting ready to leave
When somebody grabbed old Jim by the sleeve
And this good looking girl was asking my buddy to dance

I said Jim don't do it there's something missing
There's fellers dancing and fellers kissing
There's a feller in high heeled shoes wearing panty hose
He said partner I just can't turn this down
You just go over there and have one more round
And I'll dance with the lady
And we'll get on down the road

So he walked away and left me alone
But this funny looking feller kept coming on
And he was making me mad with some of the things he said
Then he put his hand on my knee
I said if you don't get your paw off me
I'm gonna locate your nose around
The other side of your head

He said I love it when you get that fire in your eye
I said well partner try this on for size
And I unloaded on him and he went out like a light
Everybody in that place must have been his friend
They all headed for me I said this is the end
But where I come from we don't give up
Without a fight

They were screaming and yelling and scratching and clawing
I was punching and hitting and kicking and pawing
I was holding my own 'cause I've been in a scrap or two
Old Jim come running up out of the blue
And that gal he was with come running up too
And proceeded to beat on me with a high heel shoe

I grabbed her by the hair it came off in my hand
And that beautiful girl was just a beautiful man
And old Jim just got sick right there on the floor

He dropped that dude like a shot from a gun
Smeared his lipstick made his makeup run
And me and old Jim started fighting our way to the door

We lit out of there in that Chevrolet
I put in on the floor and it stayed that way
We were going down the highway
Doing about a hundred and ten
We were headed for home and we was getting nearer
Then a red light came on the rear view mirror
And that same blame cop was pulling us over again

Now I'm sitting here in this county jail
I had to call my daddy to go our bail
But I learned me a lesson
That I never will forget again
I've done give up drinking I've give up bars
And running around the country in souped up cars
I'm going back where the women are women
And the men are men