Stupid, Ignorant Things I Have Done

Prober · 02-09-2007, 03:27 AM

(besides marrying my ex

)

Attempted to drink vanilla extract as a kid because it smelled good...

How about you?

17th Angel · 02-09-2007, 10:53 AM

I tried to swim in the family pool with my fathers tropical fish.......

I thought Crisps(chips) were made of wood..

I thought it took a week for a meal you had eaten to get to your stomach.

I thought daddy long legs could kill me.

InLove · 02-09-2007, 05:28 PM

I decline to answer that question on the grounds that it may serve to "incriminate" me even further than the evidence I have already presented on these forums.

InPeace,
InLove

Prober · 02-09-2007, 05:43 PM

I stuck a firecracker in a hay bale to see if the bale would blow up.

Burned down the barn...just a little barn...

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine · 02-10-2007, 01:54 AM

Let's see...

1) Stuck a foot in the spokes of a bike (trip to the hospital, sprained ankle, several cut and abrasions, Betadine)

2) Allowed a couple of teenagers "escort" me partway to school (mugged)

3) Ignored a kid in the hall after I served a detention (mugged and walked three miles home)

4) Stepped on something that penetrated the sole of a shoe (went into my foot, tetanus shot)

5) Stayed on campus far too long and decided not to get off the public transit where I was suggested [there was a gang of people beating someone up] (attempted armed robbery by two youths using pistols, lectured by a cop for being out so late)

6) Not paying attention to how I was going (sprained one ankle, broke the other)

Shall I continue?

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine

I, Brian · 02-10-2007, 04:24 PM

Trying to make TNT one time in college during chemistry.

The reaction was too violent, and I was seriously concerned that as the TNT formed it would detonate, so lobbed the entire lot into a sink and dived for cover.

Nothing happened, excepting that it cured me of a fascination for explosives.

China Cat Sunflower · 02-10-2007, 06:56 PM

There was a point in time when I was a kid when I thought cheese came from the inside of a cow's horn. The package said "Longhorn Cheese", and it had a picture of a cow's head with horns. Go figure.

I once hitchhiked from Selma, Alabama to Los Angeles to see a woman who had no interest in me. It took me a year to scrape up enough money to get out of there.

One night my motorcycle engine died. I couldn't see into the gas tank, so I lit my Bic lighter and held it down to the opening. Whoosh! A fire ball erupted from the gasoline fumes and singed the crap out of every hairy thing on my face, burned off my eylashes, and turned my bangs into burnt frizz.

Chris

Prober · 02-11-2007, 03:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by China Cat Sunflower

There was a point in time when I was a kid when I thought cheese came from the inside of a cow's horn. The package said "Longhorn Cheese", and it had a picture of a cow's head with horns. Go figure.

Quote:

One night my motorcycle engine died. I couldn't see into the gas tank, so I lit my Bic lighter and held it down to the opening. Whoosh! A fire ball erupted from the gasoline fumes and singed the crap out of every hairy thing on my face, burned off my eylashes, and turned my bangs into burnt frizz.

Chris

ROFL

wil · 02-12-2007, 03:50 PM

oh this is dangerous...

as I think of them I'll add the doozies...

for now how about jumping into the pool with weight shoes and a garden hose to clean the bottom.

logic wieght shoes will hold me down so I can scrape the algae at eight feet below...garden hose to breath through...

oh did I tell you no one was home but me...

first attempt to breathe through the garden hose, due to the water pressure on my chest, completely 'sucked' all the air out of my lungs and not enough muscle to breathe any back in.

jumping up from the bottom the weight shoes only allowed me to get to just below the surface and sucked me back down...

second jump got me a half a breath

third jump I attempted to reach the side...no breath

fourth jump breath...

this went on for quite a while before one hand was able to grab the coping and I could pull myself up...

still took minutes to get enough breath and strength to get myself out of the pool...

I suppose you can guess what happened when I was digging postholes barefoot.

Prober · 02-12-2007, 04:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wil

...garden hose to breath through...

And I thought I was the only one. This makes three of us!

Francis king · 02-13-2007, 10:17 AM

well, I once turned up for a job interview a week early...

wil · 02-13-2007, 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Francis king

well, I once turned up for a job interview a week early...

I like that...aggressive, assertive....

We do a 24 hour prayer vigil every year. I signed up for the beginning and the end...taking part in the midnight to 1am shift and the 11 pm to midnight shift the next day.

I got home from work knowing I'd probably stay longer than 1am and thought I'd get a nap. I got a good one, went to sleep around 7 pm and woke up at 10pm fully rested. I got a shower and drove to church. Arrived at the door about twenty minutes early.

I walked in and the church administrator looked at me quizzicly. As it turns out I was just about 24 hours late!

Prober · 02-15-2007, 02:28 AM

My Dad said I could use his sockets if I put them back.

I forgot and left them out in the rain.

He asked me where they were and when he wasn't looking, I ran around to the back of the house and grabbed them and put them back where they were supposed to be and told him "right there".

Later, he took me around to the back of the house and pointed at the cement sidewalk and said "what's that?"

The sockets had rusted in the rain and left varying sizes of rusty rings (which I hadn't noticed in my hurry) on the sidewalk!

wil · 02-15-2007, 01:40 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Prober

My Dad said I could use his sockets if I put them back....The sockets had rusted in the rain and left varying sizes of rusty rings (which I hadn't noticed in my hurry) on the sidewalk!

Sockets and Evidence

As a child I used to love sticking paper clips and bobby pins into the outlets, a shock sent me flying across the room. I learned wipe the black marks off the wall and replace the fuses or flip the breakers back. One of the many extremely dangerous things I did.

One summer my dad asked me to plant the tomatoes and fertilize the lawn. At this juncture I was extemely antogonistic and anarchistic sooo....

He told me to dig the hole for the tomato plant and then put in a half a cup of fertilizer and then backfill the hole halfway and plant the tomato. I dug the hole put in a coffee can of fertilizer and then put the roots right on top of them. Out of 10 tomato plants 3 lived. One of those three grew 15' in one direction 10' in the other went over top a 6' foot stockade fence and supplied enough tomatoes on the other side of the fence for 3 different neighbor families who harvested all year...by the end of the season so many guy wires and supports were added to hold up the monstrosity it pulled down the fence.

On the lawn instead of fertilizing evenly I did a double dose on each stripe and skipped every other stripe...our lawn looked like a flag....and writing my name in fertilizer on the side yard wasn't such a good idea either, first it burnt it in killed the grass bright yellow then brown. And for the next two years my name was two shades of green darker and grew 3x as fast as the surrounding lawn....

Prober · 02-15-2007, 01:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by wil

One of those three grew 15' in one direction 10' in the other went over top a 6' foot stockade fence and supplied enough tomatoes on the other side of the fence for 3 different neighbor families who harvested all year...by the end of the season so many guy wires and supports were added to hold up the monstrosity it pulled down the fence.