hi there, I am new to this forum so let me first briefly introduce myself. My name is Ilse, 28 years old from Holland. I converted to Islam 2 years ago. I mainly did this after reading a lot of books and the Qur'aan and finding a lot of rules in it that make a lot of sense to me. After some time, I married a muslim man. I started praying and wearing hijab and reading and reading and reading. But after a while, I started to doubt. The main reason is NOT that I don't believe in God / Allah. It is also NOT that I am too proud to kneel down for Allah or that I find myself such a good person that I don't need God or anything. I feel thankful for what I have been given in life everyday, and try to behave as good and peaceful being to all people and be patient in my behaviour. I also see in the world that all humans are in danger of doing wrong things that hurt themselves and others, and not in accordance to what they were put here on the earth for (sinning). In Islam, the concept of original sin is not there, but still man as an adult responsible for his actions has both inclinations, to doing good (follow Allah) or doing bad (follow Shaitaan). The main reason is that I found out Islam basically states that everybody who hears about Islam in correct way and doesnt follow it or at least believe it and have intention to follow it best way he or she can, shall be doomed. So when I ventured out on Islamic forums and asked experts about it, they all tell me yes of course but as humans we have a choice, you either stand with God or you stand without Him, you have free will in your actions. Sure, so I would do anything to be a good person and follow God! Who wouldn't. So the intention to make myself a better person and become closer to God is there. But then I started also to read about Christianity. And found out that they are saying exactly the same thing in their argumentation to for example an atheist! All nice and well if one has a simple yes or no option, but what if a person has to choose between the two? I know that all muslims on the forum will now come and tell me about the logic and magic of the Qur'aan and how the Bible was corrupted. And all Christians will try to explain the logic and magic of the Bible and explain that anyone opposing Jesus as savior would be a false prophet. But my point is... if God wants us to follow Him, why not 1 simple message? How can a mortal human being, with such a short life to live, ever make such complicated decisions and then being punished eternally for not making the right decision? How can I know, I was not there to witness, I cannot check who is right, I just have to trust my intuition but then both parties claim that the intuition of the other religion is based on misguidance by Satan? Honestly, first when I entered Islam it was a way to channel my love and believe in an omnipotent power, but now I have become so confused and am at the brink of just leaving both Islam and Christianity and just becoming a good person believing in myself and a universal, loving God! I want to be able to just trust my intuition in this, and this is that all humans are loved by the same God no matter what religion they are in. But at the same time I am terrified of hell, since the visions of it in both religions are so horrifying... I just want to fall on my knees and do the best for all of the world but I don't know how to!