Polygamy and Polyandry

Discussion in 'Belief and Spirituality' started by Gatekeeper, Nov 6, 2019.

  1. Gatekeeper

    Gatekeeper Shades of Reason

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    In a sense, I'm a polygamous, given the way I never quit loving those I've loved before. Truly, if you don't love still those you've loved like that, then I question whether you ever loved them at all. There's a woman who, I love too, who told me she still loved someone else. I hope she understands how much I honor her for that. It means when she loves, its true.

    The same goes for those who are polyandrous too, the woman who have loved many and still do. Even when we go our separate ways, the love between remains, and to me … that's what being faithful to the bond between means … Love.

     
  2. Gatekeeper

    Gatekeeper Shades of Reason

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  3. KnowSelf

    KnowSelf Active Member

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    posting music videos seems like a cheap shot to relay a message
     
  4. Gatekeeper

    Gatekeeper Shades of Reason

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    A cheap shot to relay a message? I'm not sure what you mean. Love is love, and to be faithful to the heart. Why? Because hearts are hearts too. I still love who I love and I always will. That doesn't mean I desire to be with them still. It means I'll always be faithful to the love shared between those I've loved before. There are some I would, but not them all ... and if I did, I have a feeling it would work the same. One on one? How could I know? It's difficult enough to deal with lust, the jealous type of those who … don't truly care if we're happy, but only seem to wish to own us too. Well … That's not me or who or the type I want to me. Jealousy bites, it hurts all who are involved with those who get jealous … to be real, it's difficult not to, given the way some people do. Believe me, jealousy hurts! .. and I've been hurt enough to last a few lifetimes.
     
  5. Gatekeeper

    Gatekeeper Shades of Reason

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    What about lifestyle? Whether polygamous or polyandrous? I've been hurt to much and have tasted too much jealousy to go that route ... The Jealous route. I can get jealous myself, which places me in a situation I don't like being in. On the same note, I need heart, honest to goodness ... I freaking care about you involved, but without ending up a jealous wreck. Here's the way I am, I like woman with woman, but not with other guys and in order to have the heart involved, it would need be the same for all involved too. I need a family who cares. That's just the way I am. Trustworthy, and faithful to those in it. That way, none in the family would have to worry about bringing anything home not desired.

    Anyone else have any thoughts on this lifestyle? Can it work? Is there another way it could work? One on one's are great sometimes, but man do they get complicated. Less complications, more love and care to share within the family, and less Jealousy involved seem to be a much better way.
     
  6. wil

    wil UNeyeR1

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    I know a plethora of polygamous folk...sort of the full gamut. I had a number of girlfriends before I got married and became monogamous.

    It is interesting basically in my mind there are people that can't handle monogamy, and people that can't handle polygamy. Basically it comes down to different strokes for different folks. Some like to go bowling, some like golf...
     
  7. Gatekeeper

    Gatekeeper Shades of Reason

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    … others like polyandry. Monogamy is great when it all goes well and say if, and I almost hate to say it, say neither in the relationship dies before the other, leaving the one left behind alone and broken hearted for the rest of their life. I would be in it for life and still am but monogamy just doesn't sound appealing anymore and for that very reason. I'm sick and tired of the heart hurt man.
     
  8. Arif Ghamiq

    Arif Ghamiq Active Member

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    I've had two Wives before and it was beautiful & loving - external issues not related to our marriage (trouble) led to the end of it for all three of us. I loved them both still and I still hear from one of them every now and then.

    It definitely can work, but according to my experience with it you have to be free of insecurities, have extremely good communication and a clear marital structure agreed upon. I could & would do it again if the situation arose.
     
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  9. KnowSelf

    KnowSelf Active Member

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    I apologize my intention was not the message but the context by which the message was presented. In creating a dialog posting lyrics is most helpful
     
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  10. Gatekeeper

    Gatekeeper Shades of Reason

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    Here again and as I've … heard it stated, every truth is only one half of a whole truth, and like a coin you don't get the complete picture until you consider the other side.
     
  11. wil

    wil UNeyeR1

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    Poly works when each wants the other to be happy. When each realizes that needs and wants are different and we all aren't plumbers, electricians, astronauts etc. If a male wants to be poly yet doesn't want the women he is with to also find companionship in other men...then he isn't really poly but more of a cad.
     
  12. KnowSelf

    KnowSelf Active Member

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    I am fortunate to have a lasting relationship with my wife of 40 years, but our relationship has underground a great deal of trial and error on both our parts. Honestly if it were anybody else they would have gotten out of the marriage a long time ago. Today we cherish our compatibility and support each others differences as contributions to the relationship.
     
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  13. wil

    wil UNeyeR1

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    I find that to be a common thread in most 4 decade + relationships!
     
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  14. Gatekeeper

    Gatekeeper Shades of Reason

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    What's a cad? Like me, I could probably do a FFM scenario, but this is namely because other M in immediate unit's would be distractions. Beyond that, if trust isn't present in every dealing with every person, then there's too much risk to even consider a relationship with, namely because if they're not trustworthy, each and every individual involved in each and every individual in the unit's relationships, then there's too much risk for an unwanted element being brought into the family unit.

    Honestly, happiness is required by all involved, and a willingness to lose a member if/when they're happiness needs aren't being met would be, in my opinion, a perquisite.
     
  15. wil

    wil UNeyeR1

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    Trust, communication and concern for others is what I've seen important in relationships, poly or not
     
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  16. Gatekeeper

    Gatekeeper Shades of Reason

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  17. Gatekeeper

    Gatekeeper Shades of Reason

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    To be or not to be … is that the question?

    No and yes, I guess ... It depends on what is being asked.

    Was that an inquiry or a matter of fact statement? That depends on the question.?

    So yeah, two can work and so can one.
     
  18. RJM Corbet

    RJM Corbet God Feeds the Ravens

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    I don't want to sound irreverent, but I believe in African tribal cultures that wives are a mark of prosperity. The more wives a man has, and the fatter they are, the more it shows he can support them?
     
  19. wil

    wil UNeyeR1

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    In western culture we we all bring home the bacon, the more participants in earning that share the proceeds the better.

    But again, the arrangements vary, communication a key...
     
  20. RJM Corbet

    RJM Corbet God Feeds the Ravens

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    There are very, very many people who do not live by western culture -- and specifically by American culture?
     

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