Atheist turned to ?

[mikemorrow]

New to this.
I'm 52 years of age and I can only remember being Atheist for my entire life.
This year I started camping by myself. I wanted to get to know myself again. Well one night this warmth came over me. I felt very peaceful and comfortable in my suroundings (deep old growth). A smile came across my face, I started to dance. I wasnt alone, there was something there with me. I felt, or heard a whisper, a name, Gaia. She revieled her self as a small child, but not quite a child. Perhaps a spirt. She said that she will become aware ( awaken?) in 3 years.
Two days later I got home and looked up the name. I was in shock.
My question is is there some religion that goes this route?
Im still confused as to what happened out there.

 

[juantoo3]

Good questions, I don't have answers, but I'm pretty sure someone will be along shortly to help you out.

In the meantime, welcome to InterFaith!

 

[CliffDweller]

New to this.
I'm 52 years of age and I can only remember being Atheist for my entire life.
This year I started camping by myself. I wanted to get to know myself again. Well one night this warmth came over me. I felt very peaceful and comfortable in my suroundings (deep old growth). A smile came across my face, I started to dance. I wasnt alone, there was something there with me. I felt, or heard a whisper, a name, Gaia. She revieled her self as a small child, but not quite a child. Perhaps a spirt. She said that she will become aware ( awaken?) in 3 years.
Two days later I got home and looked up the name. I was in shock.
My question is is there some religion that goes this route?

Yes, actually a number of them.

Im still confused as to what happened out there.

(chuckle) Your reaction is not unusual. Initial encounter with deity can be unnerving to say the least. I am no expert, but I suspect that you unconsiously asked a question and received an unexpected answer. I do not offer advise, but I can make suggestions. Research, research, research, study, think and most of all listen. I do not know what path you will travel, for this is your journey. And if you choose to take this journey, there is much to learn along the way.

Namaste
CliffDweller

 

[mikemorrow]

Thank you for the welcome. It is nice that I'm not being put down as a kook and a freak. It is hard to explain these type of things.
I first looked up Gaia and found the scientific theory. That fit nicely with what happened. Then there is the Mayan calendar. 12/21/2012.
The Awakening? You pointed out that there were some religions that fall into this category. Which ones? I need a direction. Or maybe this is something I must do for myself. I have always found to many contradictions in any organized religion. And In my opinion An organized religion separates its self from its true meaning by becoming elitist.
It has not been an easy quest, and it looks to become harder as things reveal themselves.
I'm thankful for an ear. And others open thoughts.

 

[mikemorrow]

One last thing,
When I was 8 I had a dream. Where I became a cubistic man (meaning that one could see all sides of me from any angle). The streets turned to rivers and buildings to trees. I had climbed a building and looked upward to the stars. I opened my mouth and the universe flowed into me.
Needless to say this shook me up. The dream has never come back.
Untell now.

 

[CliffDweller]

Thank you for the welcome. It is nice that I'm not being put down as a kook and a freak. It is hard to explain these type of things.

It is hard to describe an experience, for which you have no known vocabulary. As what you are describing is experential in nature, metaphor and simile offer a resource of sorts. While on this journey, you may indeed meet some kooks and freaks, but remember they may posses wisdom or information as well and it never hurts to listen, not only to them but to yourself as well.

I first looked up Gaia and found the scientific theory. That fit nicely with what happened.

Thus you have begun the journey

Then there is the Mayan calendar. 12/21/2012.

An interesting observation, not my venue, but a friend has spoken of this date.

The Awakening? You pointed out that there were some religions that fall into this category. Which ones? I need a direction. Or maybe this is something I must do for myself.

It will be best if you find your own direction. The discoveries that you will make along the way are indeed as important as the goal itself. It is somewhat like the difference between hearing someone describe a rainbow and seeing one for yourself. While both have value, they are quite different.

I have always found to many contradictions in any organized religion. And In my opinion An organized religion separates its self from its true meaning by becoming elitist.

I bid you welcome to the world of disorganized religion. It was once stated that organizing pagans is like hearding cats. I have found this statement to be quite true.

It has not been an easy quest, and it looks to become harder as things reveal themselves.

As in all journeys there will be times when hard work is required, but there will also be times when it will be a natural as breathing. Just remember to have some fun along the Way.

I'm thankful for an ear. And others open thoughts.

Your welcome

 

[CliffDweller]

One last thing,
When I was 8 I had a dream. Where I became a cubistic man (meaning that one could see all sides of me from any angle). The streets turned to rivers and buildings to trees. I had climbed a building and looked upward to the stars. I opened my mouth and the universe flowed into me.
Needless to say this shook me up. The dream has never come back.
Untell now.

Perhaps the universe was waiting for you to be receptive and ready.

 

[seattlegal]

I'm still confused as to what happened out there.

Are you comfortable with your confusion and lack of understanding, or does it make you feel uncomfortable?

 

[Dream]

My question is is there some religion that goes this route?

There are none. Gaia study is an individualistic pursuit, and most people involved are fiercely anti religious establishment types. Try reading Wicca for Dummies. Don't start any new religions please, and tell Gaia I'd like to meet her in area 51. I'm serious.

 

[iBrian]

Spiritual experiences by their nature are enigmatic and personal - I would suspect that you've been going through a rough patch emotionally of late, which I think tends to make a person open to influences and perceptions they may have previously suppressed.

As Gaia has been referenced a lot in media over the past few decades, it's certainly worth considering that this is something you may have picked up, and is a part of your conscious mind filtering something it does not at all understand into something that may make more sense.

Of course, I would also add that spiritual experiences are best not explained away, but instead treasured for the feeling and potential insight they can bring.

I can appreciate that you may be experiencing a lot of new things at present - allow your mind to remain open, and see what you may learn for yourself.

Just my 2c.

 

[mikemorrow]

Are you comfortable with your confusion and lack of understanding, or does it make you feel uncomfortable?

There was confusion. But Im comfortable.
Last night she came to me again. I smiled, and called her by name.
She giggled and said that that was the name I gave her, and that it pleased her.
My cat moved to a far corner of the room an just looked at us.
She then took my hand and we went to the beach where I first met her. The stick that I placed on a small sand mound for a sundial was still standing as I had placed it 2 months ago. As we have had many rains and high wind I questioned that it would be there as I left it. There was a star in the sand, a bottle of wine on the left side.. Somehow I changed this to beer. She responded by saying that it was for my enjoyment, but that she thought wine was prettier and did not smell as bad as beer. But this was not that important. Below the star there were a couple of wooden tools that I had used all summer. In the upper left hand corner there was a bowl with 3 mushrooms in it. I wanted to see more but couldn't focus on anything.
She told me to always face to the east, to play with the power of the north. Never face the west as I was not ready. And for now not worry about the south.
She told me that I was important to her and that she wanted to show me something. We moved over to another small sand rise that I have sat on many times looking out to the sea to the west. Down the beach to the south. There is a path going though the tall grass to the north. And to the east there is old growth forest.
She took me by the hand again and we looked up to the stars. Soon it seemed that the stars were getting closer, and we began to weave around them. This was a bit unsettling to me. I looked down at her, she giggled again, and was gone.
I looked over to my cat. He was still in the corner looking at me. He got up, and joined me in bed.

This afternoon, after work, I drove down to the beach. And hiked back to that camp ground. On the drive, there were many trees down and limbs everywhere.
There was the stick upright just as if I had just poked it into the sand. The wooden tools were there also. I picked up the tools a brought them home with me. The sundial I left it there.
I am at peace with all of this. Although there were many questions that I wanted to ask her, none of them seemed important. She seemed to be asking more of me. She is a child. I'm seeing though her eyes

 

[mikemorrow]

There are none. Gaia study is an individualistic pursuit, and most people involved are fiercely anti religious establishment types. Try reading Wicca for Dummies. Don't start any new religions please, and tell Gaia I'd like to meet her in area 51. I'm serious.

LOL No new religion will be started by me

And yes, after doing some research, I have no plans in getting involved with any religion.
This is between me and her.
Just sharing. With some that can understand.

 

[bgruagach]

I would suggest you go to your public library and look up a copy of Margot Adler's book "Drawing Down the Moon." It's basically a summary of modern Pagan religions as practiced in the United States in the 1970s (and later editions have updates with developments since then.) It's hardly a complete picture of the Pagan community today but it does give a sense of the diversity that is out there and might help you find like minds.

Another way to try and get possible names for your particular set of beliefs, ethics, etc. is to try the Belief Selector questionnaire at SelectSmart.com spiritual/religion selector quiz. What religion am I? Compare world religions and belief systems. Again, it's just a fallible manmade tool, but it can help shed some light and help give you direction for further research.

Another valuable resource is at Witches' Voice Inc. - 25 December, 2008 - 3:10:12 PM -- it's a free clearinghouse of information produced by and mostly for other Pagans. There are introductory essays on a variety of topics as well as essays on more detailed topics written by hundreds if not thousands of contributors. Witchvox is also indispensable for its networking info. There are thousands and thousands of listings for individuals and groups all around the world. Have a look to see who is in your area and you might find people of like mind are right around the corner.