Positive outlook

wil

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I have been accused repeatedly on this site for wearing Rose Colored Glasses.

My preacher taught everything just is. I prefer to think it's all good, I just can't see it when I'm in the middle of it. And all I have to do is wait and over time I will see the lessons, the blessons.

Anyway 10 years ago a buddy from this site 17th angel sent me this email. I completely believe my attitude and Outlook affected my healing from four strokes, two Open Hearts, and months of rehab. My attitude of getting stronger or die trying and living till I die still serves me well as I continue to recover. Below is 17th's missive.

______________

My bad bro!!! Here :D

Jerry was the kind of guy you love to hate. He was always in a good mood and always had something positive to say. When someone would ask him how he was doing, he would reply, “If I were any better, I would be twins!”

He was a unique manager because he had several waiters who had followed him around from restaurant to restaurant. The reason the waiters followed Jerry was because of his attitude. He was a natural motivator. If an employee was having a bad day, Jerry was there telling the employee how to look on the positive side of the situation.

Seeing this style really made me curious, so one day I went up to Jerry and asked him, “I don’t get it! You can’t be a positive person all of the time. How do you do it?” Jerry replied, “Each morning I wake up and say to myself, Jerry, you have two choices today. You can choose to be in a good mood or you can choose to be in a bad mood.’ I choose to be in a good mood. Each time something bad happens, I can choose to be a victim or I can choose to learn from it. I choose to learn from it. Every time someone comes to me complaining, I can choose to accept their complaining or I can point out the positive side of life. I choose the positive side of life.”

“Yeah, right, it’s not that easy,” I protested.

“Yes it is,” Jerry said. “Life is all about choices. When you cut away all the junk, every situation is a choice. You choose how you react to situations. You choose how people will affect your mood. You choose to be in a good mood or bad mood. The bottom line: It’s your choice how you live life.”

I reflected on what Jerry said. Soon thereafter, I left the restaurant industry to start my own business. We lost touch, but often thought about him when I made a choice about life instead of reacting to it. Several years later, I heard that Jerry did something you are never supposed to do in a restaurant business: he left the back door open one morning and was held up at gunpoint by three armed robbers. While trying to open the safe, his hand, shaking from nervousness, slipped off the combination. The robbers panicked and shot him. Luckily, Jerry was found relatively quickly and rushed to the local trauma center. After 18 hours of surgery and weeks of intensive care, Jerry was released from the hospital with fragments of the bullets still in his body. I saw Jerry about six months after the accident. When I asked him how he was, he replied, “If I were any better, I’d be twins. Wanna see my scars?”

I declined to see his wounds, but did ask him what had gone through his mind as the robbery took place. “The first thing that went through my mind was that I should have locked the back door,” Jerry replied. “Then, as I lay on the floor, I remembered that I had two choices: I could choose to live, or I could choose to die. I chose to live.”

“Weren’t you scared? Did you lose consciousness?” I asked. Jerry continued, “The paramedics were great. They kept telling me I was going to be fine. But when they wheeled me into the emergency room and I saw the expressions on the faces of the doctors and nurses, I got really scared. In their eyes, I read, ‘He’s a dead man.’ I knew I needed to take action.”

“What did you do?” I asked.

“Well, there was a big, burly nurse shouting questions at me,” said Jerry. “She asked if I was allergic to anything. ‘Yes,’ I replied. The doctors and nurses stopped working as they waited for my reply… I took a deep breath and yelled, ‘Bullets!’ Over their laughter, I told them, ‘I am choosing to live. Operate on me as if I am alive, not dead.”

Jerry lived thanks to the skill of his doctors, but also because of his amazing attitude. I learned from him that every day we have the choice to live fully. Attitude, after all, is everything.
 
But it will end. What then? Some believe that is all. Others believe there is more ...
 
But it will end. What then? Some believe that is all. Others believe there is more ...
Yup...nobody knows....not even everyone has a belief....some accept not knowing.

Irregardless....we do know that we have this perception of living today in this physical reality...we can bemoan that fact...or make the best of it. Most of the time I choose the latter. Should their be a new perception when thi one ends...I will deal with that later.
 
What a wonderfull story. It really captured My heart. We really do have two choices. Every day, every moment. And we can choose to live!
 
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What a wonderfull story. It really captured My heart. We really do have two choices. Every day, every moment. And we can choose to live!

I tend toward logic...or claim to anyway...I am a pragmatist and utilitarian.

Stewing over the past be it loss of health or wealth, relationship issues...whatever... I simply don't see the use, don't see the benefit.

Realizing it is all.choice.is incredibly valuable. I often hear, "That is easy for you to say." And they are right. It is...once I engage my brain and disengage emotional response. And the length of time to do that, the choice and will to do that differs for all of us.
 
Can't say the same about me though. I am on the outside calm and cool but on the inside a rather emotional and sensitive being. Empathic though ,tend to focus on what is healthy and realistic. And I try to sit down to meditate every day to keep up with it all. I practice the right hand path to learn how to control my outer and inner emotions.
 
Thanks for these posts. Thinking about what you all wrote, I do have a positive outlook, a sense of it all going in a good direction. All the same, I see a lot of darkness within me and those around me, which I can't shut my eyes to, and which, at the best of times, I can hold with compassion. Mixed bag! :)
 
It is my belief that awareness is the beginning..the first step of understanding what we need to do to change perspective and behaviours.

One thing I cannot deny is my safety net...it was first family...and the irl friends and then online friends and this place.

When I was out I know there were.days I was comatose, weeks I could not move and a couple of months before I could use my phone.

I have no clue how long I was offline here...but I know coming back was a form of a.reunion...coming home and the support and love received here added to my healing...and still does!
 
I tend toward logic...or claim to anyway...I am a pragmatist and utilitarian.

Stewing over the past be it loss of health or wealth, relationship issues...whatever... I simply don't see the use, don't see the benefit.

Realizing it is all.choice.is incredibly valuable. I often hear, "That is easy for you to say." And they are right. It is...once I engage my brain and disengage emotional response. And the length of time to do that, the choice and will to do that differs for all of us.

I tend to agree with this view. But I doubt most, if any, really have the choice to switch off emotions. Emotions can at the most be borne when unwanted because they will pass with time and also keep coming again. In a species which sells happiness as the only valid option to its children, I found acceptance of the pain, while it was being, as the best approach to being at the same time. There are rare gems in what we see and hear that guide us to this view but it does not seem to be norm. Perhaps the now common curiosity about nondual thinking will improve that.
The famous line of the Serenity Prayer can be a good guide if one is of a religious inclination:

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference

A
nd just ask it of yourself if you are not religious.
 
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Tell them Neal

 
If a person can pull off feeling good about everything, more power to them! Its a great way to live, and to be.

But not all can. Not all have that kind of mastery over their brains and emotions. Some struggle with mental illness.

Doesn't mean a person oughta throw in the towel and just be a Debbie Downer all the time, but I've seen cases where if a person 'fails' to be happy, they're shamed a bit. That doesn't seem right, either.
 
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I've seen cases where if a person 'fails' to be happy, they're shamed a bit. That doesn't seem right, either.
Absolutely not.

But I have learned...for those of us who can leave the perception of now and enter into a state if seeing a new potential of now....

My job is to not enter into the darkness with them to console them...but stand in my light, to reach in with a hand, provide assistance to find their way out....of they can make that choice.

Definitely different strokes for different folks
 
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Absolutely not.

But I have learned...for those of us who can leave the perception of now and enter into a state if seeing a new potential of now....

My job is to not enter into the darkness with them to console them...but stand in my light, to reach in with a hand, provide assistance to find their way out....if they can make that choice.

Definitely different strokes for different folks
Absolutely. If someone can stay 'afloat', there's no reason why they can't help those trying to find their way out of the water.

It is harder for those who are swimming in circles and are unaware the shore is nearby, or for some reason or the other are unable to even perceive of the shore. In cases like that, all you can really do is throw them a life jacket.

I tend to play both roles. I'm sometimes the reaching hand... put sometimes get pulled in, too.
 
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But it will end. What then? Some believe that is all. Others believe there is more ...
If there is more...than it doesn't end.

While I am aware that some believe in more, that some claim to know there is more, and what it is! I am not one of them.

Hell I don't even know fully what this existence is. I just know I cannot explain to a fish in the sea what water is and they are living in it.

Tis the same for me....I can't see beyond this existence...but if there is...I like bonus rounds!
 
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