Good at what?
Just kidding. Sort of.
This has been a most amusing thread to read. I tend to think less of goodness and more about harmony. If there is a harmony, a balance. This might look or feel very bad in a moment, but cosmically be for the best. Or an action might look or feel very good in the moment, but cosmically be lousy.
I'll share examples from horse training, just for the heck of it. Horses are generally happy when they have no pressure and don't feel like they have to lead. It's a prey herd thing- built into them. Now, in horse training, if you have a snapshot moment of when I'm correcting a horse for being naughty, I may look quite "bad." And it doesn't feel that pleasant to me or the horse, either. I have to overcome my fear that taking hold of the horse will escalate to a fight, and I also have to overcome my desire to avoid difficult situations, leadership, and so on. And the horse doesn't usually like a correction much either. But in a larger, long-term horizon, correcting a horse consistently results usually in only a few skirmishes, and then the horse learns I am the leader and can be quiet, happy, and calm. Knowing that I am the alpha and on the lookout for predators, the horse can be stress-free. Furthermore, the horse then becomes safer and more respectful, and we can be in partnership as I look after his needs and he respects mine.
Conversely, a horse owner who just always gives her horse pets and kisses and cubes of sugar might look "good." The snapshot of loving, nurturing behavior is good. But if that person never balances that with discipline, and returns a bite or buck with sugar cubes, that person is creating a fearful, dominant, unhappy horse. A dangerous horse. Horses that end up in slaughterhouses are often those that were spoiled until they harmed people. So in a more global sense, a long-term sense, that good act of giving snuggles rather than correction is doing no one a favor. I've seen many horse owners wind up with broken bones and a horse sold because of taking what feels and looks good rather than what is best and most harmonious with how horses work.
And, as Sam pointed out, something can look good in the moment but really have no underlying good motivation. Whether or not the motivation matters is a point of contention. I think it does, and in fact is the primary thing that matters, but many others could disagree and have very solid logic for doing so.
For me, goodness, if you want to call it that, is really harmonious-ness. This arises from cultivating self-awareness, mindfulness of the moment, careful and critical thinking, openness, creativity, and then the self-discipline to act on it.
Sinful (wow, there really is no way to shorten that name nicely!
) pointed out what s/he feels makes him/her feel bad- failure to act according to what is right/best and the issue of self-discipline. But even knowing how one
should act in a given situation is a profoundly demanding and challenging prospect when one contemplates the complexity. Even commandments like "thou shalt not murder" demand that we define murder. This process of self-knowing, awareness and mindfulness, of connecting to that cosmic, global trajectory of our actions- of the ripple effect- this in itself takes tremendous self-discipline and openness to growth. For me at least, it is this first step that is most difficult. Once I really am connected to the Divine and therefore to this cosmic understanding, I feel an enormous internal pressure to follow it, both in terms of what I should do and avoiding what I shouldn't do. When I fail, it is more often because of lack of alignment with this connection than sheer avoidance of action. Not sure if that's just me or what, but there you have it.
