Your Daily Rant

To Whom It May Concern,

If you cannot stay awake during a baseball game, don't waste the fooking ticket.

To Whom It May Concern #2,

It isn't funny when a batter is beaned by a baseball so hard that he literally is lifted off his feet and is thrown a couple of feet up and back! If he had landed wrong, he could've ended up either paralyzed, comatose or fooking dead.

To Whom It May Concern #3,

You brought your kids to the game, you keep control over them. I'm not their grandparent, but I could've easily absconded with them if I wanted to (which I don't, thankyouverymuch.)

To Whom It May Concern #4,

The electronic scoreboard isn't the proper place to propose to your girlfriend. It just makes any rejection that much more difficult on her part.

To Whom It May Concern #5,

What makes you think that it's a good-for-something idea to joke about and/or attempt to bring some kind of known/classified weapon into a ball park? Swiss Army knives are knives, albeit pocket knives. Live with the fooking decision of security!

PhyllisSidhe_Uaine
 
Last edited:
To Whom It May Concern,

You require a walker/frame. You walk very slowly.

Why the fook did you start crossing a rather busy street when the traffic light was yellow, ready to turn red, in the direction you were crossing? Your walker has a nice seat. Use it!

(The guy was hit by a car, the driver couldn't see him. He was lucky that he wasn't hit/run over by the streetcar.)

To Whom It May Concern #2,

You own/pilot a speedboat. You don't need to slow down after the bridge was raised. Hell, your boat was small enough to fit under said bridge when it was fooking down.

(The boat was one of those that can be used for waterskiing, but too small for sleeping on. Nobody was being towed, either. The bus was delayed long enough for me to let another passenger know that the Peppa Pig tour was going to be in Milwaukee in October.)

To Whom It May Concern #3,

Can you read? The little convenience store on the ground floor of the student union couldn't take your credit card because the system was undergoing maintenance (I actually tripped over the sign going in) plus they're going into the summer hours, which means that they close at 4:30 pm. You want a cola? Vending machines Practically everywhere in the union! Go to town! I purchased two frozen items, which aren't sold outside the union except at either grocery stores or gas station/convenience stores.

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
When me dad passed his share of the farm was automatically split between my brother and myself. Upon my demise same thing, my share will automatically go to my son. Well, since I don't materially participate in the operation and my son does, figured I'd give my share to him now as a wedding present. Had no idea the legal wrangling that entails. Took three attorneys and a judge to sort it! -o_O
 
Nah, has to do with the way our particular shares are structured. Legal fees weren't that bad though, 2 of the lawyers are more or less on payroll and the 3rd works for the state. Basically, just needed an addendum allowing succession prior to death and then get a judge to sign off on it. That took 3 go's.
 
Aussie Thoughts said:
Nah, has to do with the way our particular shares are structured. Legal fees weren't that bad though, 2 of the lawyers are more or less on payroll and the 3rd works for the state. Basically, just needed an addendum allowing succession prior to death and then get a judge to sign off on it. That took 3 go's.
Click to expand...

And a fooking pint each go, eh?

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
Sounds like a cake walk vs dying to get it accomplished! Congrats, success.

Takes about a thousand drops to learn a new juggling trick and have it ready for stage. I guess that causes me to look at life differently.
 
To Whom It May Concern,

It would've been nice if you could've let me know that you were leaving the agency and going back to Kansas City. :rolleyes:

Why did I have to find out through the receptionist? Besides, I need to know who's going to get me home from my teeth extraction...

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
To Whom It May Concern,

I'm allergic to pork products and whole/2% milk (I don't know what causes the reaction from pork, but it's the fats in the milk that I react to [have been allergic to dairy fats since I was knee-high to a grass snake].) Please withhold the pork tenderloins and the gallons of whole milk from my share of free food. I appreciate the dried pinto beans and the lite fruit coctail was used as snacks to go with my medications.

The only ones who can eat pork in my apartment are :kitty:s, and they don't need an entire tenderloin! I'm trying to get rid of both the milk and pork, but nobody seems to want them.

To Whom It May Concern #2,

Why did it take your replacement less than an hour to reschedule my teeth extractions, and have a backup plan in place in case she couldn't make it herself, while you inconvenienced both the oral surgical team and me not only the time that I actually went to get the procedure done, but subsequent times that I could've had the situation with my mouth taken care of! My diabetes and my cardiac condition are intertwined with the health of said teeth! I hope that you enjoy your new home in Kansas City, plus I hope that you have to deal with someone whose case is more complicated than mine!

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
To Whom It May Concern,

Why am I getting another new caseworker? It's been less than a fooking month since I was handed over to the one that I have atm. *headdesk*

To Whom It May Concern #2,

Yes, I am hirsute. It's none of your d@mned business what's going on with me (I'm IS) since you're not my PCP, endocrinologist or OB/GYN! BACK OFF.

To Whom It May Concern #3,

Stop scalping tickets for guest bands at Summerfest. Ditto buying up souvenir t-shirts, then hiking the price on those. (the particular band that I know of that this happened to was the one that I saw today, who came from at least three, possibly four, countries that used to be in the former Soviet Union.)

Be grateful that I didn't scream, "Scalpers!" while I was leaving because there were several law enforcement personel around us, all armed. Ditto within earshot of the band I saw (can you say, "International Incident"? I knew you could!)

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
To Whom It May Concern,

You want the pork tenderloin in my freezer, correct?

I let you know that I was undergoing dental surgery that they had to put me under for, and I've been pretty much "out of it" since Monday, plus there are at least three neighbors with the same praenomen (the only difference is that the neighbor whom I'm "speaking to" has a dog, plus he lives somewhere on the second floor [I think].)

If you want the roast, please come down to the community room on the first floor for it!

Thank you. /sarcasm

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
To Whom It May Concern,

Yes, split pea soup can be vegan Vegetable broth is just that; a broth made strictly from vegetables. I read ingredient labels, plus I know how to cook. You should try it sometime without going to the "just add water" soups.

To Whom It May Concern #2,

My bus pass expires on August 1 of this year. I'm not the only one who needs to get a replacement that day. Let's make a day of it, okay?

To Whom It May Concern #3,

Throwing a temper tantrum that two-year-olds can take notes on doesn't make you right; just makes you look foolish (at the very least.) It doesn't exonerate the person/people that you're trying (in more ways than one) to defend (especially if the person/people also throw temper tantrums when they don't get their way.)

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
To Whom It May Concern,

If you want to argue, do it either at home or at your destination. If you're behind the wheel, pull over, get out and "have it out". Fooking walk if need be. You're a fooking collision just waiting to happen.

To Whom It May Concern #2,

Nobody needs to know what colour your extended leg boxers are or whether they are that colour the entire length. Please pull up your pants or someone else will, perhaps violently. If you require assistance in keeping them up because a belt just won't do the job, either invest in a pair of suspenders or get a pair of shoelaces and use the laces to decrease the waistband (one can do the trick, trust me.)

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
I don't know which I find funnier, the low rider, can't walk right pants falling down clothing style or the I hate the pants below my butt clothing style.

I guess it isn't any different than other generations that wore.things to piss off.the others...

It.wil be interesting.tho when the geezers pick it up.
 
wil said:
I don't know which I find funnier, the low rider, can't walk right pants falling down clothing style or the I hate the pants below my butt clothing style.

I guess it isn't any different than other generations that wore.things to piss off.the others...

It.wil be interesting.tho when the geezers pick it up.
Click to expand...

It's when the boxers are both threadbare and need to go into the laundry that make things that much more "interesting"...

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
Not a rant really, just some friendly advice to my fellow motorists after having chauffeured the wife yesterday on a long drive to her job training:

1) Riding my bumper will not increase the posted speed limit.

2) Riding my bumper will not make the cars in front of me go any faster.

3) Riding my bumper in an attempt to make me go faster will likely have the opposite effect.
​
I miss the days when I drove a big 4 door sedan and everybody was afraid to pass me because they thought I was a cop.... :cool:
 
Namaste Jesus said:
Not a rant really, just some friendly advice to my fellow motorists after having chauffeured the wife yesterday on a long drive to her job training:

1) Riding my bumper will not increase the posted speed limit.

2) Riding my bumper will not make the cars in front of me go any faster.

3) Riding my bumper in an attempt to make me go faster will likely have the opposite effect.
​
I miss the days when I drove a big 4 door sedan and everybody was afraid to pass me because they thought I was a cop.... :cool:
Click to expand...

Wanzers!

Noone would want to ride one of their "bumpers" (just look up the Front Mission series to see what I mean if you're curious.) If you backed up in one of those, the tailgater would regret that decision!

Wanzer is a melding of "walking panzer" aka a walking tank.

Phyllis Sidhe_Uaine
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top