Advice from my friends please

[Muslimwoman]

My head is battered trying to work out what to do with this problem so I need input from my friends here at CR.

As you know I have been here for a few months trying to get my web business up and running, which of course means I have been away from my beloved hubby and home all summer. I am trying to get some income for our life and his family, it is important I do not fail long term.

Because of a few hitches the website is not finished yet, it may take a further 2 weeks. I am due to fly home the first week in December but that only gives me 2 weeks max between the site going live and going home.

My family want me to stay an extra month or 2 to make sure the site is running well and do some advertising locally. I say the whole business is web based so it doesn't matter where I am in the world. Most of the advertising will be through emailed press releases and adverts sent out online.

Hubby is desperate for me to come home and threw a fit when I suggested staying here for longer. Mum and Dad threw a fit when I said I wanted to go back as scheduled. Also I miss hubby and my life over there so much but am worried if I let emotion rule that the business may not get off the ground.

What would you do in my situation?

Should I sacrifice short term for the long term benefit?

What can I do here that I can't do there? (although the net is notoriously sporadic there)

HELP .....

 

[flowperson]

Salaam my friend...

It sounds as if you are being placed between a rock and a hard place. Are you doing that, or is your family doing it for you ?

Is your only reason for setting up your site to earn money, or for the welfare of others that you love ? You understand of course that your own welfare matters the most. If you love and miss your husband then I would say that you belong there, even if that may mean it will take somewhat longer to get your website business into a moneymaking mode. Your family in the UK and in Egypt should surely understand you and your desires well enough to follow your judgements on this.

Try and talk with someone else who is in the "net" business world. Perhaps Brian would have a suggestion or three. It's good to strike out on your own and learn by doing, but it may be even better to have the counsel of someone who has faced and surmounted similar problems. Good advice, especially if it is freely given, is a very valuable commodity.

Of course I offer my advice having been married twice without good outcomes, and also to have failed miserably at starting and running my own small business. But nothing teaches as effectively as failure.

For what it's worth my dear...

flow....

 

[bob x]

If you will take advice from an "enemy":
One version of Parkinson's Law is that "work will always expand to fill all the time available for it". Your web design can suck up an infinite amount of time if you let it; no matter how much you do, there will be more to do if that is where you put your priority. It sounds like it is past time to put a little more on the back burner while you attend to more important things.

 

[iBrian]

Well, as someone who runs an internet services business...

Quick question - is this your own business, or your family's? Simply that I don;t understand why your relatives need you there as internet services can be developed anywhere. I really can't see why you should need to be in Town A to run an internet based business when you can surely do it from Town B?

Also - local advertising? Is there actually a marketing plan developed around this, and if so, who's footing the bill? Also, why a local advertising campaign instead of paying for traffic via PPC?

If you'd like to explore the business aspects more, feel free to ask at the free business help forum I run here:
UK Small Business Forums

 

[wil]

Me thinks two months could easily turn into two years. Business takes time and effort even if it is a scalable website.

The net is the net and you should be able to guage what percentage of your effort currently is done in person and what online. And what percentage of the in person could be converted to online, and if you have a person their that can act in your stead.

The site I've been working on is not up and running and I am here...tis my issue. I'd be headed home...

But as my preacher says, "If I were in your shoes I do what you would do in your shoes."

 

[Muslimwoman]

It sounds as if you are being placed between a rock and a hard place. Are you doing that, or is your family doing it for you ?

wa alfa salaam Flow

My mother specifically. She really believes I belong here and not in my home with my husband. You think I am a control freak, you should meet my mother.

Is your only reason for setting up your site to earn money, or for the welfare of others that you love ?

To be honest Flow I would be so happy to just be a housewife but Egypt is a hard place to live and I could change lives if I could earn an income from the UK. If this business is successful I could earn enough in just 2 months to buy my inlaws a nice apartment and get them out of that bloody slum. This is why it is so important I succeed, so many people are relying on me (no that is not true or fair, they want nothing from me but I want to give them a better life - I am driving myself crazy aren't I). My husband works very hard but he has no opportunity of improving our lives, I have a good brain in my head so can achieve things he could not dream of, it is my desire at least to try.

I have joined a business forum and am getting loads of good advice, it is the emotional aspects I am struggling with and the Spiritual ones, I feel so far away from my faith here I want to hear the mosques calling me to prayer.

If you will take advice from an "enemy":

I don't believe you have learnt so little about me Bob, I have no enemies, only friends I disagree with.

One version of Parkinson's Law is that "work will always expand to fill all the time available for it". Your web design can suck up an infinite amount of time if you let it; no matter how much you do, there will be more to do if that is where you put your priority. It sounds like it is past time to put a little more on the back burner while you attend to more important things.

Wow you are so right, there just are not enough hours in the day now and I seem to be achieving so little, yet working so hard. Good advice my friend, time to go home and work from there. The net may be unreliable but I have nothing but time to devote to this.

Quick question - is this your own business, or your family's? Simply that I don;t understand why your relatives need you there as internet services can be developed anywhere. I really can't see why you should need to be in Town A to run an internet based business when you can surely do it from Town B?

It is my business but my father has paid for it to try to help me out. My mothers thought process is that I need to be here to do the advertising side (leaflet drops, etc) but I think I can do these by post before I go.

Also - local advertising? Is there actually a marketing plan developed around this, and if so, who's footing the bill? Also, why a local advertising campaign instead of paying for traffic via PPC?

Honestly, I don't have any income so PPC is beyond me, I could afford about £30 a month and that isn't going to get me very far, hence the idea of the local ad campaign. I am talking with someone from UKBF re doing me a targeted list for flyers to be sent out to but haven't had a quote for that yet. I have the same problem with SEO but I cant accept the argument if you dont have the funds forget the business idea, I have to find ways to make it work.

If you'd like to explore the business aspects more, feel free to ask at the free business help forum I run here:
UK Small Business Forums

I joined a few weeks ago, so shall get over there and get posting.

Me thinks two months could easily turn into two years. Business takes time and effort even if it is a scalable website.

Another very good point, what if things are not finished by then would I stay an extra 6 months? NO. I want to go home. I knew my friends would sort my head out. Thank you everyone and I feel confident in offering my husbands thanks too.

The net is the net and you should be able to guage what percentage of your effort currently is done in person and what online. And what percentage of the in person could be converted to online, and if you have a person their that can act in your stead.

About 80% of my target audience will spend little or no time online (farmers etc) but I can reach them through sending flyers to the places they hang out, this can be done by email if people will print them off and pin them up?

Salaam

 

[China Cat Sunflower]

I don't have any real advice for you Sally, but I'll offer you a personal observation. It's been my experience that as one approaches the finish of a complex project the noise level cranks up to a din and all the gremlins come piling out of the closet. Part of that is everyone with "helpful" advice, but there is also the fact of an ever increasing impatience and anticipation of finishing that goes along with the exhaustion at the end of a long haul. OK, I guess I will give advice after all. Put your head down, put your blinkers on and your ear plugs in. Pace yourself and work smart and methodically. Stay patient and keep pushing toward the finish. If things are becoming this hard it's because you're so close to the break out point.

Chris

 

[Quahom1]

My head is battered trying to work out what to do with this problem so I need input from my friends here at CR.

As you know I have been here for a few months trying to get my web business up and running, which of course means I have been away from my beloved hubby and home all summer. I am trying to get some income for our life and his family, it is important I do not fail long term.

Because of a few hitches the website is not finished yet, it may take a further 2 weeks. I am due to fly home the first week in December but that only gives me 2 weeks max between the site going live and going home.

My family want me to stay an extra month or 2 to make sure the site is running well and do some advertising locally. I say the whole business is web based so it doesn't matter where I am in the world. Most of the advertising will be through emailed press releases and adverts sent out online.

Hubby is desperate for me to come home and threw a fit when I suggested staying here for longer. Mum and Dad threw a fit when I said I wanted to go back as scheduled. Also I miss hubby and my life over there so much but am worried if I let emotion rule that the business may not get off the ground.

What would you do in my situation?

Should I sacrifice short term for the long term benefit?

What can I do here that I can't do there? (although the net is notoriously sporadic there)

HELP .....

Listen to your husband's concerns.
Listen to your parents' concerns.
Listen to your own concerns.

Look at the potential vs. the real vs. the hopeful (if that is accurate)

Weigh the differences (logically).

Choose and advise all of your choice.

Eventually, get a two way satellite internet pick up for home...(Hughes Net comes to mind).

But don't discard outright, based on emotional tugs...

my two cents.

v/r

Q

 

[Quahom1]

I don't have any real advice for you Sally, but I'll offer you a personal observation. It's been my experience that as one approaches the finish of a complex project the noise level cranks up to a din and all the gremlins come piling out of the closet. Part of that is everyone with "helpful" advice, but there is also the fact of an ever increasing impatience and anticipation of finishing that goes along with the exhaustion at the end of a long haul. OK, I guess I will give advice after all. Put your head down, put your blinkers on and your ear plugs in. Pace yourself and work smart and methodically. Stay patient and keep pushing toward the finish. If things are becoming this hard it's because you're so close to the break out point.

Chris

Hey damn! I think we were saying the same thing! lol

v/r

Q

 

[Muslimwoman]

Thanks Chris

Yes I can hardly type for the din and my head is going to explode at any moment. I stupidly thought it would get easier near the end but instead all the emotional stuff has crawled out of the woodwork or maybe it was always there but there was less pressure on the work front?

I have my earplugs at the ready, blinkers are on and head is firmly down (I may even sing lalalalalalala loudly when people speak to me). I just want to go home, clean my apartment and pretend to be a dumb blonde again, it was so much easier that way.

Cheers
Sally

 

[China Cat Sunflower]

One more thing and then I'll shut up. The difference between a professional and an amateur product is in the finishing details. There is always an urge to cut corners at the end. It's hard because you're tired and everyone is pushing you to get done, but if you want the satisfaction you have to finish the details. Good enough isn't.

You can do it Sally. Throw everyone a bone. Tell them whatever it is they want to hear to get them off your neck, and then finish it your way.

Chris

 

[China Cat Sunflower]

Hey damn! I think we were saying the same thing! lol

v/r

Q

 

[Muslimwoman]

Eventually, get a two way satellite internet pick up for home...(Hughes Net comes to mind).

I have checked satellite links out but they are £3000 so it is again the chicken and egg, I need it to run my business but until my business makes money I can't afford it (the sound you hear in the background is my head banging off the wall).

Good enough isn't.

This is one of my problems Chris, I know it isn't so I am going round in circles triple checking everything (I am a perfectionist but also a woman so I change my mind every 5 minutes).

Throw everyone a bone. Tell them whatever it is they want to hear to get them off your neck, and then finish it your way.

Between you and Q you have convinced me that the only solution is cloning myself, I shall ask Flow about that he is bound to know how.

 

[bob x]

Do you know about the 90/90 rule?
The first 90% of any project takes up 90% of the time you have allotted to it.
The last 10% takes up the other 90%.

 

[Muslimwoman]

Well I have only just finished the first 90% so I am in BIG trouble.

 

[China Cat Sunflower]

This is one of my problems Chris, I know it isn't so I am going round in circles triple checking everything (I am a perfectionist but also a woman so I change my mind every 5 minutes).

Oh, OK, well... the flip side is that trying to be too perfect can wind up wasting a lot of time and really screw things up.

Between you and Q you have convinced me that the only solution is cloning myself, I shall ask Flow about that he is bound to know how.

Wouldn't that be nice!

Chris

 

[17th Angel]

Go for glory..... (long term decision.) You won't regret it, even if you fail. If you do not go for that glory ;\ You will regret that this chance to make a difference was let up :\ If you family are understanding.... Then, they shall understand. I am making this sound too simple? lol, Indeed I is.

 

[Snoopy]

You think I am a control freak, you should meet my mother.

Salaam Sally,

I wonder where you got this from then?



For what it may be worth, I think you should take the advice of your best friend, i.e.

The business aspect: Use an online business forum for loads of good advice.

The emotional and spiritual aspects: You need to be where your faith calls you.



Love should not be possessive.

Snoopy.

 

[greymare]

Sorry, mw, Im not a business woman. I would be worried that going back home to Egypt wouldnt happen for a long time. A business can take up a lot of your time, but you seem to be missing your husband much more. So what if the internet is a bit bodgey in Egypt, Im sure you can organise something. Even if you just went home for a little while and see how the business goes without you. Could you fly back to England if you needed to? What bout your folks, they seem to be very supportive of you but I feel maybe your mum might want to tighten those apron strings once again. I cant blame her, I am a clingy mother. I just never knew it until my oldest moved out wwith his girlfriend. I cried for days. (sook) Anyway, thats my two cents worth. But youhad better still try to post regularly. Love theGrey

 

[flowperson]

Between you and Q you have convinced me that the only solution is cloning myself, I shall ask Flow about that he is bound to know how.

Scrape the inside of your cheek vigorously with a sterilized and dull knife for about five minutes. You will see a collection of cells on the edge of the knife when you take it out of your mouth.

Quickly, scrape the cells from the knife into a blender in which you have placed the ingredients for the smoothy of your choice.

Blend the mixture, including the cells of self, for a minute or two until smooth and creamy.

Drink it all down at once.

Do this at least three times a day, four helps to move things along more quickly.

Always place a Cabbage leaf over your face when you go to sleep at night once you begin this dietary routine.

One magical morning when you least expect it, a small Sally clone will appear on your pillow next to your head.

Care for the clone as you would any other small and important animal. But be careful, their growth rate is seven times the normal human rate.

In three of your years you will have a complete and competent adult clone of you who will be more than willing to live the parts of your life that you have been sickened by.

Good luck !

flow....